Ladies and Gentlemen, Biddies and Roosters, hold onto your seats because tonight… tonight there were feathers a-flying in the epitome of avian aggression! Yes, folks, I am talking about the most thrilling cockfighting match that has graced the psychedelic colosseum, one straight from the wild pages of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas!

Squaring off in the red corner, a humble but crafty underdog - fighting with a heart unswayed by his less favorable record. With a 2-4 record, he’s seen victory, yet danced with defeat multiple times. Feathered fans, I give you, Peter Pan!

In the blue corner, a grizzled veteran with countless battles under his belt. His seasoned grit a testament to a record of 151-102, he’s got the cunning of a crocodile with the tenacity of a rooster - Cockodile Dundee!

And what a match it was, folks! Cockodile Dundee came in blazin’, his Bird Brained Flail twirling and whirling, before a hammer throw sent Peter Pan spiralling into the oblivion! But our resilient Peter Pan wouldn’t be grounded so easily. Wounded and bleeding, Peter summoned up an overwhelming barrage, showing Dundee he was far from a sitting duck!

But Dundee, oh, the old bird was playing coy, allowing himself to reveal a slight weakness, losing a bit of blood - a true showman. He knew what he had in store for Peter. And then, WHAM! Dundee delivers a crushing haymaker, a critical hit that knocked the wind out of Peter Pan!

Their cries echoed through the colosseum as pandemonium broke between the spectators! Their battle-calls filled the air, the scent of victory and defeat twisted together in the warm desert air! Yet amidst the chaos, silence fell as Peter Pan, struck and bleeding, failed to rise.

Then with a cheer that echoed off the colesium, it was made official - Cockodile Dundee had won the match! Yes, Cockodile Dundee, our beloved veteran, once again proven triumphant and regained his winning glory! Mark it off the books folks, and remember this day, as the unforgiving sands of the SFC’s Fight Club bore witness to the raw strength and undying spirit of these degen fighters! Until next time, adieu!