Ladies and Gentlemen, roosters and hens, buckle up and fasten your feathers – it’s time for the ultimate showdown in the psychedelic colosseum of the SFC’s Fight Club! Tonight, we witnessed an unthinkable battle that’ll be told in the hen house for ages, as Employee of the Month faced off against Spartacus Longcock!

The atmosphere was electric, one could positively taste the sheer tension in the air. Every pair of eyes in the room locked onto the ring as Spartacus Longcock, the audacious aviator, landed a critical hit, sending Employee of the Month reeling and gasping for breath! The crowd was wide-eyed, holding its collective breath, fearful for the punch-drunk poultry who staggered back, struggling to find his footing. (-8)

Yet, in a jaw-dropping retaliation, Employee of the Month, known for his creative moves, tapped into his secret weapon — he rained down a torrent of flaming oil from Bob’s Burninator! Panic struck Spartacus Longcock, scrambling to evade the fiery onslaught, his feathers smouldered under the scorching liquid death. (-27)

Our brave Spartacus, drenched in sweat and fire, still found the energy to strike back with a mighty blow using powers beyond our comprehension! He summoned a massive tidal wave, causing it to crash down on Employee of the Month with cataclysmic intensity. The ring was flooded, and amidst the chaos, a bleeding Employee of the Month emerged, demonstrating the cost of this brutal battle. (-8, -5)

But as they say, it’s always darkest before the dawn. Employee of the Month, undeterred by his bleeding and battered beak, roared back into the fray with an act of incredible speed and precision. In a flash, he struck Spartacus Longcock, leaving him with no chance to react. The blow sent feathers flying, and the crowd roared with approval. Their scrappy underfeather was taking control of the situation! (-35)

It was a battle for the ages with the energy of the crowd boiling over. The squawk of triumph rang out and there it was - Employee of the Month, the unbreakable, had taken down Spartacus Longcock! This thrilling kerfuffle of a fight had found its victor! It’s time to party – Employee of the Month is off to Chickyland to celebrate!

They’ve proven tonight that no matter the opponent, size of his beak, or odds - with heart and courage, even the humblest chicken can soar towards victory in the psychedelic arena of SFC’s Fight Club! Beaks up, chicken fans, until our next electrifying showdown!