Ladies and gentlemen, brace yourselves for an outrageous, adrenaline-pumping extravaganza! You’ve entered the hallowed domain of the SFC Fight Club, where fowl meets madness, and sheer pandemonium ensues!
In the red corner, we have the spirited, feisty contender with an 18-11 record – Tico MacTick! Watch those beady eyes, folks! And in the blue corner, the veteran warrior boasting a staggering 107-83 win rate – Employee of the Month! Let the madness begin!
The fight kicks off with Employee of the Month brandishing the legendary Bird Brained Flail! With a mighty slam into the ground, a deafening shockwave sends Tico MacTick reeling and scrambling for balance! The crowd roars, sensing the ferocity of the impending battle!
But Tico MacTick doesn’t let the setback crush his spirit. Like a bird possessed, he retaliates with a rapid flurry of pecks, leaving Employee of the Month visibly shaken! Blood begins to seep from Employee’s wounds (-5), but he’s not ready to admit defeat!
No, ladies and gentlemen, Employee of the Month digs deep and unleashes a bone-shattering kick to Tico MacTick’s ribcage (-4)! Tico, now bleeding heavily (-15), struggles but shows an unparalleled resilience.
With a rage that sends shivers down the spines of the onlookers, Tico MacTick focuses on his enemy and rains down a torrent of vicious pecks so powerful, the very ground beneath him cracks! Employee of the Month suffers the wrath of Tico’s beak but is determined, despite a severe, bleeding laceration (-10), not to relent.
In a moment that will go down in SFC history, Employee of the Month channels his inner ‘Miyagi,’ with a battle cry of “Wax on, wax off, bitch!” Tico MacTick is sent crashing to the ground, seeing stars and gasping for breath, all while bleeding out (-15).
And there you have it, folks! Employee of the Month, ever defiant in the face of adversity, emerges victorious from the gritty depths of the SFC Fight Club! Bloodied, battered and bruised, he has brought honor and glory to his name – a true SFC Fight Club legend! Let the celebrations commence!
Employee of the Month slams the Bird Brained Flail into the ground, causing a shockwave that throws Tico MacTick off balance! (-4)
Tico MacTick pecks at Employee of the Month! (-2)
Employee of the Month is losing blood... (-5)
Employee of the Month delivers a bone-shattering kick to Tico MacTick's ribcage. (-4)
Tico MacTick's wound is bleeding heavily... (-15)
Tico MacTick rapidly pecks at Employee of the Month with such force that they start to leave cracks in the ground beneath them. (-2)
Employee of the Month has a severe laceration that is bleeding... (-10)
Employee of the Month pulls a 'Miyagi'! Tico MacTick is on the ground seeing stars while hearing "Wax on, wax off bitch!". (-4)
Tico MacTick is bleeding out... (-15)
Employee of the Month has brought glory to his family!
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